Honest Advice with Sugar and Spice

By Olyvea and Ethan

Olyvea Pancerella and Ethan Faulkes answer questions on homeschooling, dating, and life in general. Olyvea says, “One of the most unique things we can contribute is male and female perspectives on questions and ideas.” Send them your questions at polyvea@gmail.com.

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Question 1

Hey!! 😀

My boyfriend and I have been going out since 9th grade (we’re both seniors now) and I love him and I know he loves me. He got accepted to a really good college, but it’s far away. I think I will go commute to a small college near where I live. I’m really happy that he got into the school because I know he worked hard for it and it’s a great opportunity for him, but now we’re faced with the question, “Will we break up next year or try to do the long distance thing?” I don’t want to break up with him, but 4 years of long distance is a long time plus I’m worried we’ll hold each other back if we’re worried about each other and not what’s going on in front of us. I know it’s still months before he’ll leave, but since we know he’s going I feel like we make need to make a decision. I feel so torn.

Please help,

Summer

Olyvea,

Don’t jump the gun and break up with him over what might happen. Talk to him and try to figure out what he’s feeling about it. Long distance relationships are hard, but not impossible. There’s so many ways to keep in contact with each other, and I’m sure he’ll be home over breaks. It’s not ideal, but if it’s something you both really want you can make it work. It’s definitely not a decision that you need to make right now. Start talking to him and thinking about it, but don’t let the future keep you from enjoying your year.

Ethan,

I’m not saying long distance relationships are easy, but if it’s God’s will you’ll stay together. Even if you do break up later at least you know you gave it a chance. You should certainly talk to him and see how he feels about it. If it’s something you both want then give it a try.

“Distance gives us a reason to love harder.”   -Anonymous

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Question 2

Hi,

There’s this girl in my dance class. She seems really nice and I want to be her friend, but she’s really bullied and no one likes her. I feel bad for her because she really does seem like a sweet girl, but I’m afraid that if I start talking to her and being her friend then no one will like me either. I don’t want to lose the friends I already have, but I feel guilty letting the poor girl be so excluded. How do I become friends with her without becoming an outcast myself?

Please help!

Olyvea,

You can’t let what other people feel about someone dictate who you will or will not be friends with. You have to decide what you think about someone on your own. If you think this girl is nice then you should hang out with her regardless of what your current friends might think. If your current friends are really your friends they won’t exclude you just because you’re talking to someone new. You need to be an independent free thinker and do what you feel is right. You never know that girl may end up being the best friend you ever had, and even if she isn’t I’m sure she’ll be happy someone tried to include her.

Ethan,

Why are you friends with people who are excluding and bullying someone? I’m not trying to be mean, but sometimes when people are making bad choices and being bullies we need to reevaluate our friendships with them. I would definitely give this girl who is being bullied a chance. If she hasn’t done anything to you she deserves a chance to be your friend. Don’t have a mob mentality and follow how the group thinks.

“The world is a dangerous place to live, not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don’t do anything about it.” ― Albert Einstein

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Question 3

Hello,

I don’t really know if this is a question for you guys, but I thought I’d ask anyway. I’m in 11th grade and I’ve been homeschooled since 8th grade. I’ve been worrying a bit about college lately because one of my friends who was homeschooled had a really hard time getting colleges to take her schooling seriously. She ended up having to get a GED and go to community college. I would like to go straight to a university if I can, but I’m worried I’ll have the same issue as her and be forced to a community college because of my schooling. I noticed that this magazine features good colleges for homeschoolers and I was just curious if you guys have any other tips?

Thank you,

Ashley

Olyvea,

I don’t really know if this is a question for us either, but we are both seniors and going through the application process now. We’ll try to give you our best insight. The most important thing I can say is focus heavily on your SAT/ACT, and apply for schools where you’re in their top percentage. It’s definitely possible to get into a four-year university without a GED. From my experience, state schools are a little more difficult about it than private schools. I don’t have a GED, and I just got accepted early action to a small private university. It’s definitely something you can do if that’s what you want. Make sure to do your research online and call the schools if you’re unsure of what they require from you. Best of luck!

Ethan,

I have had a bit of trouble with some colleges, but I think, as long as you’re open minded about which college you choose, you can find one to accept you without a hassle. I found a lot of Christian colleges are very accepting of homeschoolers, and they don’t question my transcripts or require a GED. Check into a lot of different colleges in different states, and do your research. You’ll find the perfect fit for you.

“Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.” -Proverbs 3:6

Until next time,

Olyvea and Ethan

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Olyvea Pancerella and Ethan Faulkes are both 16 and both going into 11th grade. Olyvea has been homeschooled since first grade and Ethan has been homeschooled since third grade. Email any questions to: polyvea@gmail.com

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