Advice Paradise: Ripped Jeans, Fake Christians, Dating a Narcissist, and More

advice paradiseIntroducing our newest column… Advice Paradise!

“It’s a jungle out there. Disorder and confusion everywhere. No one seems to care.”

Well, WE do!

“It’s a jungle out there” implies that the whole world is the proverbial “jungle,” a dangerous environment filled with hazards that you have to navigate through safely. If you watch the news these days, you can see that idea isn’t too far-fetched!

Do you feel like you are “walking on eggshells” to avoid the next confrontation? If you are seeking a peaceful space where you can find the answers to your questions, you’ve come to the right place – Advice Paradise!



We’re not psychologists, counselors, therapists, or experts – we’re just fellow homeschoolers who are willing to help if you need a little friendly advice. No question is too trivial. Just ask about anything you want to know! We promise to keep it simple and get straight to the point, with a bit of wit to make your day a little brighter.

The Advice Paradise team will answer questions on homeschooling, relationships, religion, and life in general. Sometimes it helps to have a second opinion, and we’re here for you. Readers can answer a question, too, by leaving a comment.

Check out the following questions and see if any of them apply to you, or maybe you’ve been in the same situation and have some helpful advice to give someone else. Feel free to post a comment if you think you have a better answer!

  1. Is it immodest to wear deliberately ripped clothes?

It depends on what part of the clothes are torn, but either way it’s in poor taste. You should look presentable in public. This is something your mother should have taught you at an early age. “Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity” (I Timothy 12).

  1. How can I become mean like everybody else?

You can’t; you’re just too nice. Besides, why add to it? Anyway, everyone is not mean, at least not all the time. The mean ones may have gone through, or are going through, or are expecting to go through a difficult, frustrating, or unpleasant time. Show compassion or at least do not respond in kind.

  1. Why do so many prominent evangelical Christians get caught in scandals?

They are not Christians. They are only pretending to be. They know how to “talk the talk” but they don’t “walk the walk.” Since they are not filled with the Holy Spirit, they lack the “fruit of the spirit” (faithfulness, kindness, self-control) and instead pursue acts of the flesh (selfish ambition, sexual immorality, drunkenness). See Galatians 5:16-26 for more examples of acts of the flesh vs. fruit of the spirit. Read about fake Christians and false prophets here.

  1. How do I know if I’m dating a narcissist? I feel so insecure around him. He always gets defensive when he sees anything as criticism. I’m not happy and he talks down to me like I’m a child. How do I tell if he is a narcissist?

When courting, the guy should be ready to cross a river full of alligators just to bring you a glass of lemonade. Your wish is his command, your smile his blessing. This is natural. If that has not been your experience with this guy, you might want to reconsider the relationship.

Do you have a question?

Send it to and we will share it with the Advice Paradise team to be posted in the next issue of Homeschooling Teen. (Don’t worry, it can be anonymous.)

Would you like to answer a question or offer some advice?

Please leave a comment below with the question number for reference. Thanks for helping!

P.S. We hope you like our new advice column! We’ve missed Honest Advice with Sugar and Spice, which ran from August 2014 to May 2016, so we’re excited to start one up again!

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